My cat gives me a boner
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
