D3 body, D1 cock
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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