I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
