I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
