either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
