it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
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