I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
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