The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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