I'm drive I can fine osifer
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Randomize
