Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I think I died a long time ago.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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