i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
