Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize