have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
