after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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