you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
