No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
