dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize
