I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Even my vagina gasped.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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