watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
