HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
