I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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