Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
