Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
I got married tonight..
I'd like to first of all congratulate you on your marriage. Secondly, probably one of the best drunk texts I've ever received. Unless you were sober, then that text was awkward.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
