So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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