Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
