dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
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