You can't motorboat a personality
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
