I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
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