Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
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