I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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