You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
If I had your ass I would rule the world
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
