He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Sex in the backyard? Check.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
