Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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