The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
