My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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