Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Randomize
