so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
