I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
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