maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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