i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
