just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
