some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Randomize
