I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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