he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
A bitchslap is in order.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
