South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
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