it's too hot outside to masturbate.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
