Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Randomize
