He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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