I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
