I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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